Monday, 27 November 2017

Feeling nervous

On Saturday, a newspaper article is due to come out that will talk about how women without children feel about this time of year, in the lead up to Christmas, and yes, I’m probably going to be in it. It is good that they intend to acknowledge that there is an overwhelming focus on children at this time of year, and that advertisements always show parents and children, never single women or men, or couples without children.

But I am nervous, because this will be in the newspaper of our city, New Zealand’s capital and my home for the last 30 plus years. People I have worked with will open the newspaper and – perhaps – recognise me, and read whatever the reporter chose to quote from me, judging or pitying or mocking or empathising. I’d feel so much happier if I had control of the words that will go in the article, but sadly, that’s not how journalism works!

Still, I have to breathe deeply, and embrace the vulnerability, reminding myself that the people I care about already know who I am and how I feel (largely). I have to hope that someone will read it and feel a little better, knowing they are not alone. And I have to hope that it will cause some people to think just a little more about those women and men around them who don’t have children, and try to make this time of year a bit easier for them.

11 comments:

  1. How nerve wreaking! Especially as your story and thoughts would be so much better coming from you. But even if it’s not perfect, I have faith it will give people reason to stop and rethink their misconceptions about those who are living as families of two or are single. Because there’s no one right way to live a fulfilling life

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  2. How exciting! Can't wait to read the article!!

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  3. Oh, wow. That sounds, as Cristy said, truly nerve-wracking, but also an opportunity. I hope that the article will be a good one and really bring some much needed attention (especially at this time of year).

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  4. Can you make a follow up post about how the people reacted? I'm from the Philippines. Thanks! :)

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  5. That is exciting and terrifying all at once! Any way you can post (or email me) the article when it comes out? I'd love to see how it turns out. I am so glad you contributed to this article. It's certainly a rough time of year for so many reasons. I'll be hoping the journalist was kind and honest! Can't say I have high hopes for commenters, who can sometimes be beasts.

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  6. Eager to read the piece! Well done and congrats on taking the plunge, Mali. Cheers to you!

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  7. Good for you for contributing to the article! I hope it will make people think and like you say be a nice reminder to some that they are not alone in how they feel about this time of year

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  8. Oh wow! I can understand the nerves. BUT. Way to go for putting yourself out there. I hope you can post it here so we can read it!

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  9. Read the article and it's really good. Thank you for representing us women without kids. Well done!

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  10. Late to comment, but you know how much I admire you for "outing" yourself like this & speaking up on our behalf! Well done! <3

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